Forget the Oscars–real fashionistas know that the event of the year is the Met Costume Gala…but apparently the following stars didn’t get that memo because they simply did not bring the heat. The theme was “Manus x Machina: Fashion In An Age Of Technology,” which could have had a variety of interesting interpretations, but these celebs just did their best to disappoint me.
Read on to see who’s earned my ire for the next 12 months…
What a waste of a killer body and face. I’m not even going to bother researching who designed this American flag-ish atrocity, because I don’t want him or her receiving death tweets. Irina, you’re dating Bradley Cooper, I know you can do better.
And the hair…did she come straight from the gym????
Upon seeing this, you cannot be overly shocked that her teenage son Rocco wants to put an entire ocean between himself and his mum. Seriously. At 57-year-old, Madonna still shows up like this:
I’m surprised he hasn’t burst into flames out of sheer humiliation. Roc, if you need a place to crash, you can have the guest house out in East Hampton. We’ll change your name and you can start life anew as my little brother. You’re welcome.
Considering she was the co-chair for the prestigious event, I expected T to look a little more dramatic and couture and a little less…this:
This Louis Vuitton look is nearly identical to a Helmut Lang dress I wore five long years ago. And, Tay, the bleached hair and black lipstick also hasn’t been cool for ages/ever and even the strappy boots feel very last year. :/
Sorry, what year is it? Because I swear I’ve seen Gaga in a look like this, oh, about one million times before.
Sky-high hoof heels, body suit, fried and dyed hair–zzzzz. This look is as tired. Considering LG once wore rotting flesh on a red carpet, I really did expect more from her.
Zayn Malik (and Gigi Hadid, Guilty By Association)
What are we looking at here: an It Couple on the red carpet or a hostage situation?
I’m inclined to say the latter given Zayn’s pained expression, which he kept on all night. And who could blame him? Those ridiculous “bionic arms” or whatever clearly weren’t measured to suit his frame. They appear to be placed about 5 inches too low–on his bicep instead of shoulder–rendering him immobile, woefully unable to text Harry Styles or anyone else for help.
I gather Gigi (literally) strong-armed him into this and he’s hating it. Speaking of G, I’m not over the moon about her look, either. I think she could do better and wear something with a little more wow factor. If the world’s hottest It Couple can’t dazzle me, who can?
1998 called, it wants its look back.
Tacky and terrible and totally out of style, this look isn’t working for me. From the overblown boob situation to the Cruella de Vil hair that hasn’t been cool since Contempo Casuals was a thing, there’s nothing about Nicki’s style that I can tolerate.
It’s not that KJ doesn’t look gorgeous–she does, she literally always does–but she just blends into the crowd in this Vuitton macrame dress. And that’s never something a model should do…
Considering she has the best bod in the biz, KJ could’ve worn almost anything and pulled it off, and this dress is just very meh. It was probably oh so sexy IRL but it’s a better look for the Oscars or Golden Globes, not something as fashion forward as the Met Gala, don’t you agree?
But oh darlings, I’ve saved the worst for last…
I AM SO BORED.
Awful, awful, awful. This Janeane Garofalo-inspired monstrosity isn’t even acceptable to wear to the laundromat, let alone the Met Gala. Too casual, from her hair to those unforgivable shoes and obviously, the dress/vest in between. I hate it all with the fire of a thousand suns and will never, ever understand how Selena is the most followed person on Instagram. Not if this dull look is the best she can do for fashion’s biggest night.
Tell me, minions, which starlet let you down the most? Did I miss any who deserved a little sartorial shaming? Or did some of these celebs delight you right down to your YSLs?