The Problem: One Boring Length
Who: Jesse Eisenberg, The Fix: Instead of settling for an awkwardly grown-out buzz-cut, have your barber freshen it up with a multi-length fade. The shorter back and sides will help avoid the dreaded tennis ball effect.
The Problem: Too. Much. Beard.
Who: Vincent Lindon, The Fix: We should be able to see your mouth. If it’s being obstructed by hair, you need to get out the clippers. Use your clippers to trim the hairs that creep up your cheeks and down your neck. A beard can be long and still neat. But this is just straight up unkempt.
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The Problem: A Wild Chin
Who: Usher, The Fix: When you’re hair cut is as neat and tidy as Usher’s, the last thing you should be doing is letting your beard grow wild. Trim the length until you can’t see quite so many holes.
The Problem: Ear Shag
Who: Shia Labeouf, The Fix: Nothing makes a haircut look lazy faster than overgrown side burns. We’re digging the curls, but Labeouf could a trim around the edges.
The Problem: An Attention-Thirsty Goatee
Who: George Clooney, The Fix: Avoid looking like your facial hair is glued on by keeping the edges ever so blurry. If that doesn’t work you could just avoid goatees and grow a full beard.
The Problem: Half-Baked Facial Hair
Who: Louis Garrel, The Fix: If the beard you are growing isn’t ready for public consumption (or a red carpet), shave it off and start over in the morning.
The Problem: Tan Lines, the Neck Edition
Who: Russel Crowe, The Fix: We’re not sure how Crowe achieved this particular tan line. But the resulting stripe of white skin against his burn is creating the illusion of a double chin. Our advice, don’t fall asleep with your head slumped?